Please Stop Putting Things On My Face

I love my Mom and Dad very much but there's just one thing that I wish that they would stop doing - please stop putting things on my face. I'm not sure why they keep putting things on my face. Is it because I'm not coordinated enough to bat them away and knock the object off my face? Or because I seem to want to eat everything that comes near my face and they think that's funny? Well, it might be funny for them but it's no fun for me. Why would you want to cover up such a cute face? And look! I'm completely helpless! Even with my arms swaddled, they STILL put things on my face. But just you wait. We'll see who gets the last laugh once I can break out of my swaddle...